Comic skits for children 10 years old. What skits can be put on for children at a summer camp. Scenes from everyday life

27.04.2022

In 2019, at the summer camp, children often arrange impromptu concerts, where they perform various amateur performances - they read poetry, sing songs. Especially popular with the audience are short skits staged by children in the camp. They can be based on some well-known fairy tale, for example, the fairy tale "Gingerbread Man".

Short funny skits for summer camp

This summer camp miniature features a leader, a boy, a bear, a wolf, and ticks.

Leading:
There was a boy in a summer camp. And then one day he decided to run away from there. A boy walks through the forest, and a bear meets him.
Bear:
- Boy, boy, I'll eat you!
Leading:
- And the boy answers him ...
Boy (clapping the bear on the shoulder):
- Oh, bear! I left the counselor, I left the teacher, I left the head of the camp .... And from you, clubfoot, and even more so I will leave!

The surprised bear opens its mouth and follows the boy with his eyes, who calmly walks away from him.
Similarly, there is a dialogue with the wolf, which the fugitive meets. But then, in this funny scene for children, he is attacked by evil ticks.

Leading:
- The boy went into a thick, thick thicket, and met there ... a gang of ticks.
They surround him from all sides and take him prisoner.
Boy:
– Yes you that, brothers! I left the counselor ...
But the pincers pat him on the shoulder and say:
- Oh boy! Yes, we do not care, from whom you left! We ourselves are hiding from the sanitary and epidemiological supervision.
This miniature ends with the host's words:
- This is the end of the fairy tale, and whoever listened, well done!

A short skit at a summer camp can be performed by putting the fairy tale "Turnip" in a new way. It will be funny if the roles of small characters are played by big guys and vice versa. For each of the characters, you can make masks by printing images on a color printer and sticking them on cardboard.

From childhood, the guys remember the text of this fairy tale, which is the best fit for this cool miniature in the camp. The host reads it:

- Grandfather planted a turnip. She grew up big and big.
The grandfather went to pull the turnip. Pulls, pulls, but can not pull.
Grandpa called grandma. Grandmother for grandfather, grandfather for a turnip. They pull, they pull, but they can't pull it out.
The grandmother called her granddaughter. Granddaughter for grandmother, grandmother for grandfather, grandfather for turnip. They pull, they pull, but they can't pull it out.
Granddaughter called Zhuchka. A bug for a granddaughter, a granddaughter for a grandmother, a grandmother for a grandfather, a grandfather for a turnip. They pull, they pull, but they can't pull it out.
Bug called the cat. A cat for a bug, a bug for a granddaughter, a granddaughter for a grandmother, a grandmother for a grandfather, a grandfather for a turnip. They pull, they pull, but they can't pull it out.
The cat called the mouse. A mouse for a cat, a cat for a bug, a bug for a granddaughter, a granddaughter for a grandmother, a grandmother for a grandfather, a grandfather for a turnip.
Pull-pull - and pulled out a turnip.

In this short funny skit, each of the characters will say a short phrase. When the narrator mentions the turnip, the actress playing this role will say: “That's what I am!”.

Similarly, in this one, the rest of the characters in the miniature will pronounce lines. Grandfather - “Well, fir-trees!” Grandmother - “Oh, where are my seventeen years old?” Granddaughter - “It’s not my fault!” mouse - "What kind of zoo is this?".

Another version of the replicas of the actors - the grandfather will say: "Oh, if it weren't for the Internet, your grandfather would be a sprinter!" Grandma can be given the words: “Botox, fitness and lipstick - what else do you need for a grandmother?” The granddaughter will constantly repeat: “Thicker turnips - we can earn more money!” etc.

The plot of the famous fairy tale in this fun summer camp skit can be changed or supplemented as you wish. For example, a scene may include such plot twists:
- A mouse ran past ...
The cat caught the mouse
And demanded menacingly
For her to come to the rescue.
The mouse has nowhere to go
She can't refuse
But the granddaughter and grandmother fled,
After all, they are afraid of mice.

Cool sketches for children about summer camp

***
Children can also act out scenes about life at the summer camp. For example, a scene about Petya and a goldfish.

Petya Perepelkin is sitting in front of the aquarium in a living corner. He lowered the fishing rod into it and begs the goldfish:
- Fishy fish, make me the strongest in the camp so that I can knock down Vanka Shapkin with one blow! And also make me the most beautiful so that Tanya Rastyapkina falls in love with me without memory! And I also want to become the smartest so that I can win everyone in the game “What, where, when”!

Then the counselor appears in this miniature about the summer children's camp. He sees what Petya is doing and says:
- Petya, get away from the fish! She's not magical, she's normal!

Petya leaves, but then returns and everything repeats again: the counselor comes and asks the boy to leave.

Finally, the fish cannot stand it and also gives a voice:
- That's it, I've been telling this Petya for two hours now, but he doesn't understand anything! They read Pushkin, there is no peace from them ...

***
The next funny skit about the summer camp involves the counselor and the guys. The counselor enters the ward before lights out. The kids are on their phones. Someone listens to music, someone sends SMS.
Leader:
Everyone gave me their phones!

He takes the phones and puts them in a bag. In the morning, the counselor who holds his head complains:
- Fiends! ... Everyone, before handing over the cell, started an alarm clock on it! For 2 nights, 3, 4, 5… and so on until morning!

***
In another children's skit about camp, a granddaughter and her grandfather are talking during parental day.
A little girl in a pink dress plaintively asks:
- Grandpa, get me out of here.
Grandfather (in a T-shirt, shorts and with numerous tattoos) answers her:
- Granddaughter, camp is camp. The term must be served in full.

***
In another funny miniature, a crowd of hungry children run into the dining room. They see an inscription on the dining room door: "Lunch will be served at the right gate of the camp." The guys run to the right gate, where they also see the inscription: "Lunch will be served at the left gate of the camp." A crowd of children run there ...

At this time, the counselor announces over the loudspeaker:
-Attention all units! Lunch is canceled for running around the camp!

Short funny scenes for children in the camp can also be staged based on the fables of I. A. Krylov “Monkey and Glasses”, “Squirrel”, “Crow and Fox”, “Titmouse”, “Dragonfly and Ant”, “Quartet”, “Swan , crayfish and pike.

Or you can play funny school-themed miniatures at the summer camp. Choose the appropriate props and musical accompaniment, rehearse performances by roles - and the audience will certainly like this performance.

The development of artistry in children is one of the great ways to identify them, to determine the direction in which it is better to develop their creative potential. Does the child like to copy the behavior of acquaintances and friends? Arranges whole performances in the yard, gathering numerous spectators? Do you often sing and gesticulate?

Small theatrical performances, including short and funny children's skits, can be organized even at home. And if someone's birthday is foreseen, then mini-sketches will be great entertainment for everyone who comes to congratulate the birthday man.

Mini shows for kids

Usually children join the game with pleasure, they like to transform, copying adults, they accurately notice various nuances in the behavior and habits of people they know. When choosing scenarios for a children's holiday, you need to pay attention to the following points:

The younger the participants, the shorter and simpler the skits should be.
It is advisable to diversify the repertoire as much as possible: choose not only skits-parodies that are offered for children of any age, but also skits-riddles, skits-quizzes.
If possible, hold one or two rehearsals before the start of the performance, tell the child how best to introduce the character he will play.
If possible, try to use attributes that will make the production more colorful - costumes for actors, scenery, items necessary in the course of action. You can and should involve children in making decorations - this will also give them a lot of pleasure.

Scenes from everyday life

Children are happy to participate in staging performances, showing funny cases from their daily lives. Here are the simplest and shortest of these scenes.

How many legs?

This scene requires two actors: a boy and a girl. Its plot is quite simple, so it can be successfully played in front of children 4-6 years old.

Mom (girl) came to pick up her baby (boy) from kindergarten. She is in a hurry, so she sits him on a chair and starts dressing him quickly.

He takes the shoe in his hands and says:

- Raise your leg, son.

The boy obediently raises his right leg. Then mom says:

- No, give me another one.

The son raises his left leg. Mom, looking at the shoe, understands that the right leg was still needed, but automatically repeats:

- No, son, give the other leg.

Then the boy says indignantly: “Mom, but that's all! My legs are over, I don’t have others!”

This scene is good not only for a fun plot. When it is over, you can discuss with the children why the mother could not explain to her son what kind of leg she needed. How would it be more correct to build a conversation so that everyone understands each other the first time?

Whose pants?

Two actors will be involved in this scene - an older girl (teacher) and a younger girl (kindergarten pupil). The age difference is an optional condition for young actresses, you can just pick up a girl taller and smaller.

However, it is important to pay attention to the nuances associated with the characteristics of the roles of young performers, because this will make their performance more believable and memorable!

Kindergarten. Children dress up for a walk. The teacher helps little sluggish girl Katya get dressed. Katya tries to put on trousers, and she does not succeed. The teacher begins to help her. When the trousers are put on by joint efforts, Katya suddenly reports:

“These aren’t my pants…”

The teacher, expressing her indignation as much as possible, begins to pull the trousers back from the baby. This takes some time. After waiting for the teacher to finish undressing her, Katya decides to clarify:

- These are the trousers of my sister, Sveta, they are warm, and my mother always puts them on me when it is very cold, like today ...

More scenes and ideas

Additional scenes for small children's plays and sketches can be found in books on acting. They contain not only the scenes for short productions themselves, but also teach the intricacies of children's stage skills, which will help stir up children, develop intelligence and memory, reveal their creative abilities, help the child develop competent speech, and teach them to express themselves through creativity.

This book will help you "Children's Theater Repertoire: Sketches and Miniatures" by Yuri Dunaev
We can also help you organize a children's party. books with games, creative competitions, theatrical performances - in the corresponding section of the online store "Labyrinth".

Scenes from the life of schoolchildren

Archimedes the Confusion

Physics lesson. The negligent student Kolya suffers near the blackboard. The teacher (an older or heavier boy) torments Kolya with questions:

– Kolya, tell us about Archimedes. Kolya squints and suffers, he obviously can tell a little about Archimedes:

- Well, it was such an ancient Greek ...

Teacher, happy

– Is that how? And what did he become famous for?

Kolya, straining even more:

- Well ... Once he swam in the bath ... And how he screams!

What will scream, Kolya? The teacher continues to ask leading questions.

"Eureka!" - unexpectedly for himself, Kolya says and happily continues:

- It means "found!".

But the teacher does not give up and continues to torment Kolya with questions:

- Well, what did he find there, Nikolai, probably something interesting?

“Probably…” Colin loses his enthusiasm. He obviously does not remember what exactly the famous ancient Greek found in his bath. Therefore, uncertainly, raising his eyes to the teacher, he tries to find the correct answer:

“Maybe… a washcloth?”

Needed fire

Schoolboy Sasha went to the store. On the way, he meets a teacher of labor, Viktor Petrovich, who is in a hurry.

- Hello, Viktor Petrovich, where are you running, what happened? he asks.

“Oh, Petrov,” the teacher almost cries, “we have a fire, so I’m running, our office is on fire, can you imagine?

Schoolboy Sasha changed his mind about going to the store, runs after the teacher. Having run up to the school, they stop and look at the smoke that pours out of the windows of the labor office.

“Here is Petrov,” the teacher says in frustration, “now there will be no classes, probably for a month.”

- What won't happen? Sasha asks.

“There won’t be any classes, you won’t finish your stool, Petrov, your stool burned down, probably,” Viktor Petrovich reports frustratedly.

Who got burned? – insistently asks Sasha.

- Stool! Yours! - the teacher raises his voice in annoyance, - And the scoop that you have been doing for the second month! I don't understand, Petrov, are you deaf or what?

“No, Viktor Petrovich, what are you,” Sasha says, and adds more quietly:

- You talk, and I will listen, listen, listen ... - and rolls his eyes dreamily.

Scenes-games

These are a kind of funny mini-performances that are popular not only with children, but also with adults.

"Photo"

One of the variations of such a game-sketch, which children of any age play with pleasure.

Game progress:

Children are divided into two groups. One group will improvise, the other will guess. Actors from the first group must think of something: an animal, a profession, a natural phenomenon, heroes of favorite fairy tales, etc.

Having guessed, the children begin to move, depicting the actions that are inherent in the characters they have guessed, and another group of participants observes and analyzes. At some point, the host commands: “photo!” and all the actors from the first group freeze, in the position in which they were at the time of the command.

Members of the second group must recognize the hidden characters. After that, they change roles with the members of the first group. The task can be complicated over time by inviting the children to make a statement, for example, on the theme of their favorite fairy tales.

Playing in entertaining mini-scenes is a great way to express yourself for children of any age. This type of creativity, like no other, stimulates the development of fantasy and imagination, gives a great mood and makes any children's holiday unforgettable.

Lecturer, child development center specialist
Druzhinina Elena

See also funny poems about school for children. The advantages of our funny scenes are that they do not require costumes, there is no need to memorize large texts (and the one who plays the role of a teacher can use a printout that can be put in a magazine), they need to be rehearsed for a short time. At the same time, these scenes are close to the students. They will be able to laugh at their mistakes, looking at themselves from the outside. Humor, jokes, funny scenes for children about school are well suited for KVN. See also School Humor.

1. Scene "At the lessons of the Russian language"

Teacher: Let's hear how you learned your homework. Whoever goes to answer first will get a point higher.
Disciple Ivanov (pulls out his hand and shouts): Mary Ivanna, I will be the first, give me three at once!

Teacher: Your composition about a dog, Petrov, word for word is similar to Ivanov's composition!
Disciple Petrov: Mary Ivanna, so Ivanov and I live in the same yard, and there we have one dog for all!

Teacher: You, Sidorov, have a wonderful essay, but why is it not finished?
Student Sidorov: But because dad was urgently called to work!
Teacher: Koshkin, confess, who wrote the essay for you?
Pupil Koshkin: I don't know. I went to bed early.
Teacher: As for you, Klevtsov, let your grandfather come to me tomorrow!
Student Klevtsov: Grandpa? Maybe dad?
Teacher: No, grandfather. I want to show him what gross mistakes his son makes when he writes an essay for you.

Teacher: What kind of word is "egg", Sinichkin?
Student Sinichkin: None.
Teacher: Why?
Student Sinichkin: Because it is not known who will hatch from it: a rooster or a chicken.

Teacher: Petushkov, determine the gender of the words: “chair”, “table”, “sock”, “stocking”.
Disciple Petushkov: “Table”, “chair” and “sock” are masculine, and “stocking” is feminine.
Teacher: Why?
Disciple Petushkov: Because only women wear stockings!

Teacher: Smirnov, go to the blackboard, write down and analyze the sentence.
Student Smirnov goes to the blackboard.
The teacher dictates, and the student writes: "Dad went to the garage."
Teacher: Ready? We listen to you.
Student Smirnov: Dad - subject, left - predicate, in the garage - ... pretext.

Teacher: Who guys can come up with a sentence with homogeneous members?
Tyulkin's student holds out her hand.
Teacher: Please, Tyulkina.
Tyulkin's student: There were no trees, no bushes, no grass in the forest.

Teacher: Sobakin, come up with a sentence with the numeral "three".
Student Sobakin: My mother works at a knitwear factory.

Teacher: Rubashkin, go to the blackboard, write down the sentence.
Student Rubashkin goes to the blackboard.
The teacher dictates: The guys caught butterflies with nets.
Student Rubashkin writes: The guys caught butterflies with glasses.
Teacher: Rubashkin, why are you so inattentive?
Student Rubashkin: And what?
Teacher: Where did you see bespectacled butterflies?

Teacher: Bags, what part of speech is the word "dryish"?
Pupil Meshkov, getting up, is silent for a long time.
Teacher: Well, think, Meshkov, what question does this word answer?
Student Meshkov: What kind? Dryish!

Teacher: Antonyms are words that are opposite in meaning. For example, fat - thin, cry - laugh, day - night. Petushkov, give me your example now.
Pupil Petushkov: A cat is a dog.
Teacher: And what about "cat - dog"?
Disciple Petushkov: Well, how? They are opposite and often fight among themselves.

Teacher: Sidorov, why do you eat apples in class?
Disciple Sidorov: It's a pity to waste time at a break!
Teacher: Stop it now! By the way, why weren't you at school yesterday?
Disciple Sidorov: My older brother got sick.
Teacher: What about you?
Student Sidorov: And I rode his bike!
Teacher: Sidorov! My patience has run out! Don't come to school tomorrow without your father!
Student Sidorov: And the day after tomorrow?

Teacher: Sushkina, come up with a proposal with an appeal.
Sushkin's student: Mary Ivanna, call!

2. Scene "Correct answer"

Teacher: Petrov, how much will it be: four divided by two?
Student: And what to share, Mikhail Ivanovich?
Teacher: Well, let's say four apples.
Student: And between whom?
Teacher: Well, let it be between you and Sidorov.
Student: Then three for me and one for Sidorov.
Teacher: Why is that?
Student: Because Sidorov owes me one apple.
Teacher: Doesn't he owe you a plum?
Student: No, you shouldn't plum.
Teacher: Well, how much will it be if four plums are divided by two?
Student: Four. And all to Sidorov.
Teacher: Why four?
Student: Because I don't like plums.
Teacher: Wrong again.
Student: How much is correct?
Teacher: And now I will put the correct answer in your diary!
(I. Butman)

3. Scene "Our cases"

Characters: teacher and student Petrov

Teacher: Petrov, go to the blackboard and write down a short story that I will dictate to you.
The student goes to the blackboard and prepares to write.
Teacher (dictates): “Dad and mom scolded Vova for bad behavior. Vova was silent guiltily, and then he promised to improve.”
The student writes from dictation on the blackboard.
Teacher: Great! Underline all the nouns in your story.
The student underlines the words: “dad”, “mother”, “Vova”, “behavior”, “Vova”, “promise”.
Teacher: Ready? Decide what case these nouns are in. Understood?
Student: Yes!
Teacher: Start!
Student: Mom and Dad. Who? What? Parents. So, the case is genitive.
Scolded whom, what? Vova. "Vova" is a name. So the case is nominative.
Scolded for what? For bad behavior. Apparently he did something. This means that “behavior” has an instrumental case.
Vova was silent guiltily. So, here “Vova” has an accusative case.
Well, the “promise”, of course, is in the dative case, since Vova gave it!
That's all!
Teacher: Yes, the analysis turned out to be original! Bring the diary, Petrov. I wonder what mark you would suggest to give yourself?
Student: What? Of course, five!
Teacher: So five? By the way, in what case did you call this word “five”?
Student: Prepositional!
Teacher: In a prepositional? Why?
Student: Well, I suggested it myself!
(according to L. Kaminsky)

4. Scene "At the lessons of mathematics"

Characters: teacher and students of the class

Teacher: Petrov, you can hardly count to ten. I have no idea who you can become?
Disciple Petrov: Boxing judge, Mary Ivanna!

Teacher: Trushkin is coming to the board to solve the problem.
Student Trushkin goes to the blackboard.
Teacher: Listen carefully to the condition of the problem. Dad bought 1 kilogram of sweets, and mom bought another 2 kilograms. How much...
Disciple Trushkin goes to the door.
Teacher: Trushkin, where are you?!
Disciple Trushkin: I ran home, there are sweets!

Teacher: Petrov, bring the diary here. I'll put your yesterday's deuce in it.
Disciple Petrov: I don't have it.
Teacher: Where is he?
Disciple Petrov: And I gave it to Vitka - to scare my parents!

Teacher: Vasechkin, if you have ten rubles, and you ask your brother for another ten rubles, how much money will you have?
Disciple Vasechkin: Ten rubles.
Teacher: You just don't know math!
Disciple Vasechkin: No, you don't know my brother!

Teacher: Sidorov, please answer, how much is three times seven?
Student Sidorov: Marya Ivanovna, I will only answer your question in the presence of my lawyer!

Teacher: Why, Ivanov, does your father always do your homework for you?
Student Ivanov: Mom doesn't have free time!

Teacher: Now solve problem number 125 on your own.
The students get to work.
Teacher: Smirnov! Why are you copying from Terentiev?
Disciple Smirnov: No, Mary Ivanna, he is copying me, and I'm just checking whether he did it right!

Teacher: Guys, who is Archimedes? Answer, Shcherbinina.
Shcherbinin's student: This is a mathematical Greek.

5. Scene "At the lessons of natural history"

Characters: teacher and students of the class

Teacher: Who can name five wild animals?
Student Petrov raises his hand.
Teacher: Answer, Petrov.
Disciple Petrov: A tiger, a tigress and... three cubs.

Teacher: What are dense forests? Answer, Kosichkina!
Kosichkin's student: These are the kind of forests in which ... it's good to take a nap.

Teacher: Simakova, please name the parts of the flower.
Simakov's student: Petals, stem, pot.
Teacher: Ivanov, please answer us, what benefits do birds and animals bring to a person?
Student Ivanov: Birds peck mosquitoes, and cats catch mice for him.

Teacher: Petrov, what book about famous travelers have you read?
Apprentice Roosters: "Frog Traveler"

Teacher: Who will answer how the sea differs from the river? Please, Mishkin.
Disciple Mishkin: The river has two banks, and the sea has one.

Student Zaitsev holds out his hand.
Teacher: What do you want, Zaitsev? Is there something you want to ask?
Disciple Zaitsev: Mary Ivanna, is it true that people descended from monkeys?
Teacher: True.
Disciple Zaitsev: That's what I see: there are so few monkeys!

Teacher: Kozyavin, please answer, what is the life expectancy of a mouse?
Student Kozyavin: Well, Mary Ivanna, it entirely depends on the cat.

Teacher: Go to the blackboard ... Meshkov and tell us about the crocodile.
Student Meshkov (going to the blackboard): The length of the crocodile from head to tail is five meters, and from tail to head - seven meters.
Teacher: Think what you are saying! Is it possible?
Student Meshkov: It happens! For example, from Monday to Wednesday - two days, and from Wednesday to Monday - five!

Teacher: Khomyakov, answer me, why do people need a nervous system?
Disciple Khomyakov: To be nervous.

Teacher: Why do you, Sinichkin, look at your watch every minute?
Student Sinichkin: Because I'm terribly worried that the bell will interrupt the amazingly interesting lesson.

Teacher: Guys, who will answer where the bird flies with a straw in its beak?
Student Belkov raises his hand above all.
Teacher: Try, Belkov.
Pupil Belkov: To the cocktail bar, Mary Ivanna.

Teacher: Teplyakova, which teeth appear last in a person?
Teplyakov's student: Plug-in, Mary Ivanna.

Teacher: Now I will ask you a very difficult question, for the correct answer I will immediately put a five with a plus. And the question is: “Why is European time ahead of American time?”
Student Klyushkin raises his hand.
Teacher: Answer, Klyushkin.
Disciple Klyushkin: Because America was discovered later!

6. Scene "Folder under the arm"

Vovka: Listen, I'll tell you a funny story. Yesterday I took a folder by mouse and went to Uncle Yura, my mother ordered.
Andrew: Ha-ha-ha! Indeed, it's funny.
Vovka (surprised): What's so funny? I haven't started talking yet.
Andrey (laughing): Folder... under the arm! Well thought out. Yes, your folder under the arm and will not fit, he's not a cat!
Vovka: Why "my folder"? Folder - daddy. You forgot how to speak correctly from laughter, or what?
Andrei: (winking and pounding his forehead): Ah, I guessed! Grandfather - under the arm! He speaks incorrectly, but he also teaches. Now it’s clear: dad’s folder is your grandfather Kolya! In general, it’s great you came up with it - funny and with a riddle!
Vova (offended): What does my grandfather Kolya have to do with it? I wanted to tell you something completely different. You didn’t listen to the end, but you laugh, you interfere with speaking. Yes, even dragged my grandfather, put him under his arm, what a storyteller was found! I'd rather go home than talk to you.
Andrei (to himself, left alone): And why was he offended? Why tell funny stories if you can't even laugh?
(I. Semerenko)

7. Scene "3=7 and 2=5"

Teacher: Well, Petrov? What am I to do with you?
Petrov: And what?
Teacher: All year you did nothing, did not study anything. I don't know exactly what to put in the statement.
Petrov (looking sullenly at the floor): I, Ivan Ivanovich, was engaged in scientific work.
Teacher: What are you? What?
Petrov: I decided that all of our mathematics is wrong and ... I proved it!
Teacher: Well, how, Comrade Great Petrov, did you achieve this?
Petrov: Ah, what can I say, Ivan Ivanovich! It's not my fault that Pythagoras was mistaken and this ... Archimedes!
Teacher: Archimedes?
Petrov: And he, too, After all, they said that three is only three.
Teacher: What else?
Petrov (solemnly): That's not true! I proved that three equals seven!
Teacher: How is it?
Petrov: Look, 15 -15 = 0. Right?
Teacher: Right.
Petrov: 35 - 35 = 0 - also true. So 15-15 = 35-35. Right?
Teacher: Right.
Petrov: We take out the common factors: 3(5-5) = 7(5-5). Right?
Teacher: Exactly.
Petrov: Hehe! (5-5) = (5-5). This is also true!
Teacher: Yes.
Petrov: Then everything is upside down: 3 = 7!
Teacher: Yep! So, Petrov, survived.
Petrov: I didn't want to, Ivan Ivanovich. But against science ... you can't sin!
Teacher: Understood. Look: 20-20 = 0. Right?
Petrov: Exactly!
Teacher: 8-8 = 0 - also true. Then 20-20 = 8-8. It is truth too?
Petrov: Exactly, Ivan Ivanovich, exactly.
Teacher: We take out the common factors: 5 (4-4) \u003d 2 (4-4). Right?
Petrov: Right!
Teacher: That's it, Petrov, I give you a "2"!
Petrov: For what, Ivan Ivanovich?
Teacher: Don't be upset, Petrov, because if we divide both parts of the equality by (4-4), then 2=5. So did you do it?
Petrov: Well, let's say.
Teacher: So I put "2", it doesn't matter. BUT?
Petrov: No, it's not all the same, Ivan Ivanovich, "5" is better.
Teacher: Perhaps better, Petrov, but until you prove it, you will have a deuce in a year, equal, in your opinion, to a five!
Guys, help Petrov.
(Newspaper "Primary School", "Mathematics", No. 24, 2002)

8. Scene "Schoolboy and seller"

Characters: a schoolboy and a shop assistant

Sales assistant: What do you suggest?
Schoolchild: The years of the reign of Nicholas II?
Sales assistant: I don't know.
Schoolchild: Okay ... Pythagorean theorem?
Sales Assistant: … (shrugs)
Schoolboy: Photosynthesis?
Sales Assistant: (sighing) I don't know...
Schoolboy: Well, what are you climbing then with your “What can I tell you?”!!!
(KVN team from Ryazan)

9. Scene "Schoolchildren at the stadium"

Characters: schoolchildren and stadium informant

A group of young fans led by a leader loudly chant:
"SPARTAK IS A CHAMPION!" "SPARTAK IS A CHAMPION!"
Suddenly, the voice of the stadium informant turns on:
Informant's voice: Attention young fans! (young fans stop chanting)
Your history teacher is at the match!
Young fans start chanting:
"SPA RTAK IS A ROMAN SLAVE!" "SPA RTAK IS A ROMAN SLAVE!"
(KVN team from Ryazan)

10. Scene "Unnecessary words, or Cool Dnieper in cool weather"

Characters: a cultured adult and a modern schoolboy Vanya Sidorov

Hello Vanya.
- Hello.
- Well, tell me, Vanya, how are you?
- Wu, the deeds of might.
- I'm sorry, what?
- Cool, I say, one wick blew such a thing. Rides to the sket. Give, he says, great to drive. Sat down and scratched. And here is the teacher. And he let's show off. Broke the mitten. Yes, how shaky. Himself with a black eye. The teacher almost went off the rails, but the bike hooted. In rzhachka. Cool, right?
- And what, there was a horse?
- What horse?
- Well, who was neighing. Or I didn't understand anything.
- Nu, nothing you not understood?
- Come on, let's start over.
- Well, let's. So one wick...
- Without a candle?
- Without.
- And what is this wick?
- Well, one guy, long, rolled up to the box ...
- What did he ride, on a bicycle?
- No, the child had a bicycle.
- Which sket?
- Well, shibzdik one. Yes, you know him, he walks around here with such a schnobel.
- With whom, with whom?
- Yes, not with whom, but with what, his nose is in the form of a schnobel. Well, let's go, he says, it's great to drive. Sat down and scratched.
- Did he itch something?
- No, he drank.
- Well, how did you cut it?
- What did you cut?
- Well, is it big?
- How?
- Well, this same, schnobel?
- No, the little girl had a schnobel. And the wick had a black eye, a bzig struck him in the head, and he began to roam. He opened his mitten, so he twitched.
- And why the mitten, did he twitch in the winter?
- Yes, there was no winter there, there was a teacher.
- Teacher, you mean.
- Well, yes, with a black eye, that is, with a great one, no, with coils. But the very rolling, that great whooped.
- How did you goof off?
- Well, covered up. into small pieces. Now understand?
- Understood. I realized that you do not know Russian at all.
- I don't know how!
- Can you imagine if everyone spoke the way you do, what would happen?
- What?
Do you remember Gogol's? “Wonderful is the Dnieper in calm weather, when it rushes freely and smoothly through its forests and mountains full of its waters, it neither rustles nor thunders.
- I remember.
- Now listen to how it sounds in your bzik language: "Cool Dnieper in cool weather, when, roaming and showing off, it saws its cool waves through forests and mountains. you don't know whether he is sawing or not. A rare bird with a schnobel will comb to the middle of the Dnieper. Do you like?
- I like it, - he said and ran, shouting: "Cool Dnieper in cool weather."
(Lion Izmailov)

11. A young man in a nightclub

Characters: girl, young man, mother

A girl is sitting at the bar. A young man approaches her.

Young man: Hey babe! Are you bored?
GIRL: Yes, there are some.
YOUNG MAN: Can you come with me? I will arrange an unforgettable evening for you!
GIRL: Sounds. But my mother is waiting for me at 23-00 at home.
YOUNG MAN: Is mom waiting? Drop it! What are you, 10 years old? Do you go on dates with your mom? Ha!

Suddenly, a young man's hand confidently takes by the ear. Everyone sees that this is the hand of an aged woman.

YOUNG MAN: Mom? What are you doing here?
MOM: What are you doing here?
YOUNG MAN: Well, Mom! I…
MOM: I don't want to hear! March home!
YOUNG MAN: (to girl) Baby, I'll call you back!
MOM: Home!
(KVN team from Ryazan)

12. Radiologist's office

Characters: grandmother, boy, radiologist

Radiologist's office: X-ray machine, table, chair. The doctor is sitting at the table.
A little boy and a grandmother enter the office.

GRANDMA (pointing to the boy). I've looked all over, there are no points anywhere. I think he swallowed them. All in his grandfather!
RADIOLOGIST (referring to the boy). Have you swallowed granny's glasses?
The boy does not answer.
GRANDMOTHER. Partisan! All in his grandfather!
RADIOLOGIST. Are you silent? But now we will enlighten you through and through and find out everything.
GRANDMA (happily). Yep, got it! Would love to have something like this at home.
RADIOLOGIST (examines the picture). Well, well, well ... You know ... he has here not only glasses, but also a wallet with money. I can’t say for sure, but somewhere around three hundred rubles.
GRANDMOTHER. It's not ours, we don't need someone else's. The main thing for me is to get glasses, I can’t watch TV without them.
RADIOLOGIST. We'll get it now.
The radiologist comes up to the boy, picks him up by his legs and shakes him. Glasses and wallet fall to the floor.
GRANDMA (grabbing glasses). Thank you very much, doctor. I don't even know how to thank you. Let me kiss you!
RADIOLOGIST (turns the wallet in his hands). No need. But the wallet, if possible, I will leave myself as a keepsake.
GRANDMOTHER. It's not ours, not ours, we don't need someone else's.
Grandmother and grandson leave the office.
RADIOLOGIST (loudly). Next!
(A. Givargizov)

Characters:
Father: Serpent Gorynych
Head teacher: Baba Yaga
Math teacher: Leshy
Geography teacher: Kikimora
Botany Teacher: Witch
Class teacher: Water

ZMEY GORYNYCH (flies into the teacher's room):
... Yes, I told him a hundred times! ..
So what did he do again?

LESHIY:
Multiply a minus with a sine -
Got a minus one!

KIKIMORA:
Confused albinos
With albatrosses...

WITCH:
Threw apricots...

KIKIMORA:
Blowing soap bubbles!

LESHIY:
On a bet
Swallowed the call!

KIKIMORA:
Yawned the whole lesson
And infected everyone with a yawn!

WATER:
But yesterday
dragged to class
Behemoth!!!

LESHIY:
With this nasty boy
There is no sweetness!

BABA YAGA (unctuous):
Maybe give him poison?
Or throw it to the wolves?
AM -
And there is no bad student!

KIKIMORA:
Don't get excited, dear Yaga.
In our age
Such measures are outdated.

LESHIY:
A hundred years ago
We would have it
Certainly,
Ate...
But now
We have
Not many students
In reserve...

WATER:
I agree!
Let's not run
To extreme measures.

WITCH:
Let's try to get him
Good example.

ZMEY GORYNYCH (confused):
Mmmm... Less, more...
That is, more or less!
And yet...

WITCH (interrupts):
BUT...
Understand!
Your example doesn't work...
But boy
Doesn't want to study at all!

BABA YAGA:
Oh, how much trouble with children! ..

ZMEY GORYNYCH:
Lock him in the closet - let him learn lessons!
And if he doesn't stop yawning...

ALL IN CHOIR:
We will turn it
In chewing gum
And we will
SLOWLY
Chew!
(E. Lipatova)

14. Daily routine

Characters:

Schoolboy Vova
Schoolboy Petya

PETYA:
- And you, Vova, do you know what a regime is?

VOVA:
- Certainly! Regime… Regime is where I want, I jump there.

PETYA:
- Not right! Routine is the order of the day. Are you doing it?

VOVA:
- I even overfulfill it.

PETYA:
- Like this?

VOVA:
- According to the schedule, I need to walk twice a day, and I walk four!

PETYA:
- No, you are not overfulfilling it, but breaking it! Do you know what the daily routine should be?

VOVA:
- I know! Climb. Charger. Washing. Bed cleaning. Breakfast. School. Dinner. Walk. Prep. Walk.

PETYA:
- Good.

VOVA:
- And it can be even better.

PETYA:
- How is it?

VOVA:
- Like this! Climb. Breakfast. Walk. Lunch. Walk. Dinner. Walk. Tea. Walk. Dinner. Walk. Dream.

PETYA:
- Well no. In this mode, you will turn out to be a lazy and ignoramus.

VOVA:
- Will not work.

PETYA:
- Why?

VOVA:
- Because with my grandmother we carry out the whole regimen.

PETYA:
- How is it with your grandmother?

VOVA:
- And so. Half of it is done by me, and half by my grandmother. And together it turns out the whole regime.

PETYA:
- I do not understand!

VOVA:
- Very simple. I do the lifting. Charging is performed by the grandmother. Washing is a grandmother. Bed cleaning - grandmother. Breakfast is me. Walk - me. Cooking lessons - my grandmother and I. Walk - me. Lunch is me.

PETYA:
- Aren't you ashamed?! Now I understand why you are so undisciplined.

https://website/smeshnye-scenki-dlya-detej/

15. About Pushkin

Two duelists stand opposite each other. One of them is Pushkin.

Second: Come on!

Pushkin and his opponent raise their pistols. Approach barriers. Pushkin's opponent makes a shot. Pushkin is wounded. The enemy approaches the wounded Pushkin.

Pushkin: For what?

Pushkin's opponent: Bastard! Because of you, they left me for the second year in literature !!!

16. School riddles

Characters: Schoolboy, his friend - Vovka Sidorov

SCHOOLCHILD (addressing confidentially to the audience, pointing to a friend standing nearby):
And Vovka Sidorov from our class is slow-witted! Here I came across interesting riddles about school affairs, and riddles should be in rhyme. Of course, I guessed everything right away, and then I decided to test Vovka for quick wits.

SCHOOLBOY (to Vovka Sidorov):
Here, guess the riddle in rhyme: “Between two calls, the term is called ...”

VOVKA SIDOROV (instantly):
Turn!

SCHOOLBOY:
Well, that's right, "change" is suitable, but there should be a guess in rhyme!

VOVKA SIDOROV (offended):
Yeah, he himself said that it was right, and then you start ...

SCHOOLBOY:
Okay, let me give you another riddle, just think before you say the answer. “The athlete told us: Everyone go to the sports ...”

VOVKA SIDOROV (shouts):
Score!

SCHOOLBOY:
Which store? What for? Where did you see him?

VOVKA SIDOROV:
What do you mean why? I need to buy new sneakers, otherwise the sole of mine is already lagging behind on my left foot. And the Sporting Goods store is right in front of the school. You, too, have seen him a hundred times.

SCHOOLBOY (to the side of the hall):
Well, what can you prove to him here!

SCHOOLBOY (to Vovka Sidorov):
Can you solve this riddle in rhyme? “Schools are not simple buildings, schools get…”

VOVKA SIDOROV:
Over the head! Yesterday, I almost didn’t touch the bow at Lenka Petrova’s, and she bang-bang me with a book on the head.

SCHOOLBOY:
Listen to another riddle: “And today I got another grade…”

VOVKA SIDOROV (shouts):
Three, three I again received in mathematics.

STUDENT (addressing the audience in the hall):
Well Vovka and slow-witted! Well dumbass! Although ... I look, his face is cunning, tricky. Maybe he played me? Today is April 1st!!!
(Leonid Medvedev)

17. About parents

A man in a clothing store dials a number on his cell phone.

Man: Hello, honey! … Did our Mishka do his homework? … Yes? How about in his diary? Good, yes?! So, did he leave the room? Heck! Did you eat soup? Nothing ... I just went to the store, and then the sale of belts!

TEN VIRGINS

LEADING:
The last time has come
living on earth now.
It's sad, it's sad
In nations, churches and families.
All people are now indifferent.
Nothing scares anyone.
Only the weight fell on their souls,
And their hearts are cold.
But time is running out.
And soon our Bridegroom will come.
Ready for a feast He is with Himself
He will take you to the Kingdom of Heaven.
Let's look at the picture.
What Jesus showed us
About the Kingdom of Heaven and the Virgins,
What a lesson He gave us in it.
Our bridegroom ascended to heaven
And soon He will come again.
Here the maidens come forward,
To be with Him at the feast.
Ten maidens come out and sit in front.

1st WISE:
Here ten of us came here,
So that we all meet the Bridegroom.
But will it come to earth soon
We don't know the hour or the day.
But we will try, sisters,
All the time neither sleep nor doze off.
And cheerful, with a burning luminary
Look forward to it.
Our bridegroom will soon arrive,
Perhaps even at this hour.
Look, wait with vigor
So that he does not meet us sleeping.

1st UNINTELLIGENT:
This is how I talk to myself
Perhaps it won't come soon.
Why be so afraid
Like now He's coming?

2nd WISE:
Oh, my dear sisters!
We want to go with Him to the feast.
And sooner or later,
Neither we nor this world know!
But let our light shine brightly
And let the oil be in reserve.
And let love burn in the heart,
After all, He will come to take us soon.

2nd UNINTELLIGENT:
This is how we talk to ourselves
And we wait impatiently for Him.
And if he suddenly slows down there,
We will be able to meet Him.

3rd WISE:
Oh, sisters, why think this,
What, he won't come soon?
All we need now is to believe.
To meet Him when He comes.

3rd UNINTELLIGENT:
Some heaviness finds
I don't have the strength to wait for him anymore.
And it makes me sleepy,
My lamp began to dim.

4th WISE:
For our encouragement here
Let's repeat the words together
From the book of Saint Matthew
Words of Jesus Christ.

All together: Watch therefore, for you do not know the day or the hour in which the Son of Man is coming.

4th UNINTELLIGENT:
The long-awaited one would soon come,
So that we can stay at the feast.
Now the oil is burning
And it's boring to wait

5th WISE:
Oh sisters, I see beautifully
That the hour of dormancy has come.
But let's be strong and ready
To keep us from sleeping.
And I offer you, sisters,
Let's sing at least one song.
Which so clearly sings:
"Go to meet Him."

Everyone sings.

5th UNINTELLIGENT:
How long the Bridegroom does not go ours.
And we have a little oil,
And our light is fading away
He will make us sleep.

1st WISE:
Oh no, don't try to sleep you!
May be. What is at this hour
Our long-awaited Bridegroom will come
And he will find us sleeping!

The five foolish virgins begin to fall asleep with their heads bowed down.

2nd WISE:
Oh sisters. See don't sleep
After all, sleep is coming to you.
You keep your luminaries.
He will return to us soon.
You are ready to feast with Him
Heavenly and nuptial enter.
So that we don’t cry bitterly later,
Standing at the closed door.
Then he will tell you: “Go away,
Unhappy, it's too late now.
I don't know who you are, where from,
The door is closed forever.”

3rd WISE:
Let's cheer up a little,
Perhaps He will come soon.
And let's go out to meet all boldly,
And he will take us all to the feast.
All 10 maidens fall asleep with their heads down.

LEADING: Then the Kingdom of Heaven will be like ten virgins who, taking their lamps, went out to meet the bridegroom. Of these, five were wise and five were foolish. The foolish, taking their lamps, took no oil with them. The wise, along with their lamps, took oil in their vessels. And as the bridegroom slowed down, everyone dozed off and fell asleep. But at midnight there was a cry: behold, the bridegroom is coming, go out to meet him.

CALLER:
Here comes the groom!
Why did you fall asleep and sleep?
Get up from your sleep!
The groom is coming! hurry up
To go out and meet Him!
Get up, get ready!
Light up your lights.
Try to go faster
Hurry to the feast with him to enter!
He's coming! Come out soon
Towards. Testament his voice
To feast you. Go see
So that He does not pass by you.

The five wise virgins have risen, but the foolish sleep.

1st WISE:
Here comes the cry
Our groom is coming.
Why are we sleeping here?
He is waiting for all of us.

2nd WISE:
Rather wake up dear sisters
Let the light be corrected in their luminaries.

The 3rd wise maiden addresses the sleeping.

3rd WISE:
Get up, why are you sleeping?
Get up, the groom is here!
Rather light the lights
As long as He hasn't passed yet.

4th WISE:
Get up, because time does not wait for us!
Go to meet Christ.
After all, the doors can close!
Where will you go then?

The five foolish virgins awaken.

1st UNINTELLIGENT:
What's the matter? Why are you in such a hurry?
Let's get out now.
Why are you yelling at us like that?
Like the door is closed?

2nd WISE:
We are awakening you!
Our fiance has arrived!
How long do you sleep?
Let's go ahead!

4th UNINTELLIGENT:
Oh, how can we go? After all, our light went out!
And we have absolutely no oil in the vessels.

The five foolish virgins speak to the wise.

UNINTELLIGENT: Please give it to your oil.

TOGETHER: Our lamps are completely out!

5th WISE:
We can't do it
To give you the oil now.
Perhaps then the disadvantage
Happen to you and to us.
So you better go
All of you to the sellers soon.
And buy your own oil there,
To make the light shine brighter.

Foolish virgins go out to buy oil.

1st WISE:
Oh sisters, let's go
With a burning torch in their hands.
We will hasten to the feast with the Bridegroom
And we will be with him in heaven.

They leave singing a psalm.

LEADING: When they went to buy, the bridegroom came, and those who were ready went in with him to the wedding feast, and the doors were closed; then other virgins come.

2nd UNINTELLIGENT:
Oh, where are our sisters that they are not here?
And where can we look for them to walk together?

1st UNINTELLIGENT:
Their lights burned brightly
And there was oil in the jars.
As soon as the Bridegroom knocked,
They all entered the feast before Him.

5th UNINTELLIGENT:
Why did we sleep that our light went out?

Oh what are we to do? Where to go?
All we had to do was knock on the door.

1st UNINTELLIGENT:
And I suggest, let's go to the door
And we'll knock, won't they open the door for us?

5th UNINTELLIGENT:
Why did we doze, that our light went out?
And there was no oil in our vessels.
Those five are at the feast now.
And we were here knocking at the door.

3rd UNINTELLIGENT:
What are we going to do here now?
(with crying)
Standing at the groom's door?
Ask to pray. May be,
The gates will open for us.

4th UNINTELLIGENT:
What happens when they don't let us in?
(with tears)
There, where there is a feast of the Bridegroom?
And they will say: we do not know where.
Go to darkness forever!
Oh, grief will be for all of us then,
When they won't let us in.
Remain, poor, insignificant
To sorrow, to shame, to blasphemy.
Friends, call with me
To let us all in there
Where are the wise virgins in the chamber
Always stay with Christ.

5th UNINTELLIGENT:
Oh our God! God! Open to us!
We heartily pray, let us in!
Open the gate for us soon
After all, we are standing at the door!

The foolish virgins fall on their knees and cry out

1st UNINTELLIGENT:
Our Lord! Reveal to us
To the Bridegroom's chamber
We want to login
And be there always.

2nd UNINTELLIGENT:
Our Lord and our God! Open to us!
(with crying)
Let us in to the feast of the Bridegroom.
We beseech you, Merciful One,
Let us in, let us in!
After all, we went out to meet,
And we had the light in our hands.
Only the oil was gone from the vessels.
And this is a barrier for us?

Foolish virgins with weeping and sobbing leave the door.

5th UNINTELLIGENT:
We were negligent, our oil was scanty.
And we became miserable, found ourselves at the door.

Try this easy-to-perform skit - it usually has a lot of fun for young viewers.

3 participants: mother, son and robot. Starting position: the robot stands with its arms wide apart, mother and son are on the sides of the robot, slightly ahead of it (so that the robot's palms are not far from their heads).

Son (pointing to the robot): Oh, who is this?

Mom: It's a robot. He knows how to distinguish whether a person is telling the truth or deceiving. For example, tell me, what grades did you get today at school?

Son: Five!

Booms! (the robot pretends to give his son a slap on the back of the head).

Mom: So you were lying. So what did you really get?

Son: Four.

Booms! (the robot again gives his son a slap on the head)

Mom: Not true again. What did you get?

Son: Well, three...

Booms! (slap again).

Mom: Tell the truth! What have you been given?

Son (sighing): two.

The robot strokes his son's head.

Mom: Oh, you! And at your age, I studied for one five and never lied to my parents!

Booms! Booms! (now mom gets two slaps on the back of the head!)

good reasons

Funny school scene.

Characters: teacher, student - Ilya Arkhipov and student - Anechka Beletskaya. Students distribute remarks at their discretion, for example, they answer the teacher in turn.

Teacher enters:

- Hello guys! Thank you for coming… Why are there so few of you today?

Opens the journal, starts the roll call:

- Arkhipov?

- Here…

Hello Ilya, nice to see you. Belyakov?..

- What are you, Alevtina Ivanovna! Only the second lesson! He comes to the third!

— Ah! Yes Yes…

— Golubev?

- Golubev studies at the institute on Tuesdays, in commercial, in his third year ...

- Beletskaya? .. Anechka! Are you here?

- Yes, but only after this lesson I leave - we are flying to Turkey today.