Always say what you feel and do. When should you not be silent? Or say what you feel. Marquez did not write the famous "Farewell Letter"

  • 28.10.2019

Paulo Coelho is a legendary Brazilian prose writer and poet. The total circulation of his books in all languages ​​has long exceeded 300 million. His special style and thoughts in novels, anthologies and collections of short stories-parables help the reader look at life from a slightly different angle, see the small in the great, find the strength to love, love life and look at everything with optimism.

We've put together some of the best for you. best quotes Paulo Coelho, who may help you realize something important:

  1. Our angels are always with us and often they use someone's lips to tell us something.
  2. If you are able to see the beautiful, it is only because you carry the beautiful within yourself. For the world is like a mirror in which everyone sees his own reflection.
  3. If a person really wants something, then the whole Universe will help to ensure that his desire comes true.
  4. What happened once may never happen again. But what happened twice will certainly happen a third time.
  5. When you really want something, the whole Universe will help to ensure that your desire comes true.
  6. Sometimes you have to run to see who runs after you. Sometimes you have to speak softer to see who is really listening to you. Sometimes you have to take a step back to see who else is on your side. Sometimes you have to make the wrong decisions to see who's with you when things fall apart.
  7. If I do exactly the things that people expect from me, I will fall into their slavery.
  8. True love does not require reciprocity, and those who want to receive a reward for their love are wasting their time.
  9. Life is always waiting for that hour when the future depends only on your decisive actions.
  10. Getting lost is the best way find something interesting.
  11. The darkest hour is before dawn.
  12. Just because you've been discharged from an insane asylum doesn't mean you've been cured. You just became like everyone else.
  13. If a person is yours, then he is yours, and if he is drawn somewhere else, then nothing will hold him back, and he is not worth either nerves or attention.
  14. Everyone says anything in the back, but in the eyes - what is beneficial.
  15. If love changes a person quickly, then despair - even faster.
  16. Where we are expected, we always find ourselves right on time.
  17. Life is sometimes surprisingly stingy - for whole days, weeks, months, years a person does not receive a single new sensation. And then he opens the door - and an avalanche falls on him.
  18. Waiting is the hardest part.
  19. Having reached the end, people laugh at the fears that tormented them at the beginning.
  20. If you dare to say goodbye, life will reward you with a new hello.
  21. Feeling unhappy all the time is an unaffordable luxury.
  22. There are people who were born into the world to go through life alone, this is not bad and not good, this is life.
  23. Never give up on a dream! Dreams nourish our soul, just as food nourishes the body. No matter how many times in life we ​​have to go through a crash and see our hopes shattered, we must still continue to dream.
  24. Everything in the world is different manifestations one and the same.
  25. We say the most important words in our lives silently.
  26. Sometimes you need to go around the whole world to understand that the treasure is buried at your own house.
  27. People want to change everything and at the same time want everything to remain the same.
  28. What you are looking for is also looking for you.
  29. Always say what you feel and do what you think! Silence breaks fate...
  30. Man does the opposite. He hurries to become an adult, and then sighs about the past childhood. Spends health for money and immediately spends money to improve health. He thinks about the future with such impatience that he neglects the present, because of which he has neither a present nor a future. Lives as if he will never die, and dies as if he never lived.
  31. Sometimes you have to die to start living.
  32. Always need to know when it ends next stage your life. The circle closes, the door closes, the chapter ends - no matter what you call it, it is important to leave in the past what already belongs to the past ...
  33. It happens sometimes that life separates two people - just to show both how important they are to each other.
  34. Once I found all the answers, all the questions changed.
  35. In the end, everything must be fine. If something is bad, then this is not the end ...

Giving advice to many people need. So they feel like wise men in a world full of inexperience and naivety

Giving advice to many people need. So they feel like wise men in a world full of inexperience and naivety.

1. "Don't give up on your beliefs!"

This is perhaps one of the most cunning tips, because it is at the heart of almost all heroic stories. Who would have known about Giordano Bruno if he had renounced his beliefs in fear of execution? If you already have what you believe in, then you simply have to defend your truth to the last drop of blood.

All true heroes know this. Do you want to be a hero? Well, then stand to the death ... unless, of course, your beliefs contradict the beliefs of other people - with whom you communicate and who love to give advice. Or…

Another variant:

"Never stop fighting ... but remember to think about whether you are fighting on the wrong side."

Ask PETA's animal advocates if animal scientists should fight for their beliefs. Ask the scientists what they think of the persistence of the people at PETA. Yes, for each other they are simply the embodiment of world evil and violated morality!

Most "fighters" are not heroes, but rather fanatics. Because they are incapable of compromise, and compromise is exactly what allows humanity to move forward. And it becomes possible only when a person begins to understand that the opposite side is also infected with this “Real heroes never give in!” "Always go to the end, no matter what!"

So if you're going to "put your life down" to fight for something, maybe you should at the same time declare and crusade(preferably also a lifetime) for being absolutely sure that you are not Hitler in this struggle?

2. "Always say what you think!"

When I was in the fourth grade, we had a teacher who started yelling for any reason and for no reason at all, and did it all the time. Later we learned that at that time she was divorcing her husband and therefore was a little out of her mind.

Every time she began to scold me for no reason in her shrill voice, tears welled up in me, a nine-year-old child. And I could not think of anything better than to pretend that my stomach suddenly twisted and I urgently need to go to the toilet, where I sat out until the end of the lesson, just not to return to this nightmare.

When I complained to my mom, she said, “No one gets inside your head and knows what's on your mind. If you think that the teacher is yelling at you unfairly, then tell her about it, looking directly into her eyes. I obeyed and the next time I blurted out to the teacher that she was scolding me unfairly. Then she realized that she should not take her anger out on the children, apologized and never did that again.

Joke. Of course, she didn’t realize anything, she just freaked out even more - how, they say, I dare to be insolent to the teacher. A few minutes later I was already standing in the director's office, where I was also trying to express my point of view - this time to people who, it seemed, had never divorced anyone and had to think sensibly. I thought that at least here they would understand me. Nothing like this. Even the focus with the stomach did not work there.

So I found another wording for myself:

"Speak your mind, but don't be surprised if no one wants to listen to you."

The process of growing up involves, among other things, the realization of the sad truth: the world, in essence, does not care about your opinion. Every child makes this discovery for himself as soon as he gets into an argument with an adult for the first time: You have no experience, you don't know how to argue and defend your position. So far, you have mastered only one tactic - to repeat the same thing over and over again, louder and louder and hope that such an obvious truth for you will somehow find its way to the consciousness of an adult. And when an adult realizes that the argument is useless, he gives a deadly argument - that he lives longer, therefore, knows more, and, therefore, his point of view is important, but yours is not. You don't even know what you're talking about.

And from now on, you learn to keep your thoughts to yourself. They don't matter because you haven't reached the required age or education level.

Then you finish school, and there comes a phase in your life when it seems to you that you know and understand just absolutely everything. Then you may go to university, and then it becomes obvious to you and your friends that the world would be perfect if humanity would listen to what you are trying to convey to it. And then, on a new round, you repeat the same phase that you went through when you first entered into an argument with an adult as a child. And you learn to keep your thoughts to yourself again.

You are bound to be seriously and bitterly disappointed if you are waiting for the world to start listening to you (in fact, it is quite possible that your opinion is of little value to your friends/colleagues/dogs either).

3. “What was, was. Forget about the past!

My past is far from perfect. In my youth, I wandered around, slept on the sofas of friends and caused a lot of trouble to relatives who were exhausted to pay the bills. My life has been like one endless party. When I finally started to grow up, I had to apologize to so many people, and for good reason. And more often than not, I heard something like, “Well, I'm glad you finally got your mind right. What was - it was, you can't bring back the past. Forget about him. Think about the future."

In part, of course, they were right. It is very important to forgive yourself for the mistakes that were made in the past and start moving forward. Otherwise, the feeling of guilt can drive you insane. But this does not mean at all that you just need to forget about what you had to endure and how you ended up where you ended up.

I would rephrase this advice this way:

"Remember your mistakes, but don't let them become an obsession"

People who constantly gnaw at themselves for past sins are just as unbearable as those who never for a moment stop thinking about their perfection and exclusivity. In both cases, a person stops noticing other people and focuses exclusively on himself.

It's not about forgetting the past. The point is how to deal with it.

Awareness of mistakes and their consequences is exactly what can make you better than you are now. If you remember the sad consequences of a bad decision in the past, then you will think twice before doing the same stupid thing in the future.

But when a person suggests that you "start with clean slate”, that is, there is a high probability that he is just trying to manipulate you. Like an ex-girlfriend who wants to get back to you: "Let's forget all the insults." It's tempting because it sounds like forgiveness. But most of the time, the person just wants you to forget about their own messes. An ex-girlfriend does not need you to remember that there was a good reason for your breakup.

"Let's forget the past. Because thinking about it makes me feel disgusting. Let's get straight to the part that gives me pleasure."

4. “In this life, you can only trust yourself!”

This is very easy to believe. There will always be someone very experienced who will explain how everything works in this world, and that you need to be constantly on the alert so as not to fall into the traps set everywhere.

In fact, this passive-aggressive philosophy is typical, as a rule, of people who are very fond of pretending to be victims. They burned themselves a couple of times and now live with the firm conviction that everyone around them is just waiting for the opportunity to set them up and sit them down.

In fact, it should usually be understood as “Everything is going wrong in my life, and I don’t know how to solve my problems at all. I disclaim all responsibility, because corruption in the state and the imperfection of the world as a whole make my personal efforts meaningless and useless.

It may be reasonable to question other people's motives, as is being wary of potential scammers. But building your entire life on the idea that you are the only trustworthy person on the entire planet is not only stupid, but also dangerous. Not to mention that this is one of the most selfish attitudes possible.

My version:

“Bad people exist. Learn to tell them apart."

The whole point of communication is to surround yourself with those people who are close to you and distance yourself from those whom you do not want to see next to you.

We are built to live in small groups, and forming these groups requires that we trust at least a select few.

You absolutely do not have to set yourself up for the fact that all the people around you are playing the game "well, who will have it first?" It would mean that you are the one and only morally healthy man on the planet. Add a couple of hallucinations - and you can safely diagnose "paranoid schizophrenia."

This does not mean that you should put on rose-colored glasses and share your secrets with everyone in a row. The world is full of people who really will not miss the opportunity to use, deceive and set you up. But this does not mean that every person should be approached with caution, like a rattlesnake.

This advice is good for those who are looking for an excuse to avoid the difficulties that always come up when you are trying to build relationships with other people. They are not cynics. Just lazy.

5. Seize the moment! Live every day like it's your last!"

This advice smacks of the same idealism as the call to “love absolutely all people.” If I really knew that today is the last day of my life, the first thing I would do is withdraw all the money from my account and spend it on something that I could never afford because I had to think about what will happen tomorrow. The second thing I would do would be to find the freak who bullied me at school and make him answer for all my humiliations.

Why not? If there is no tomorrow, then there are no consequences, no responsibility. Tomorrow some comet may fall to the Earth - and that's it. So why not live like it's really going to happen? Can you imagine a world where hormonal teens just walk up and offer sex? And what? If there is only today, then there is no time for acquaintance and courtship. So the only way out is to just walk up and ask until someone says yes. Hate your job? Well, forget about it - go and finally give the boss everything that you have boiled there. Why waste time on things that are not fun, even if without them you will quickly find yourself on the street?

Another variant:

"Make Today Meaningful"

It means: to do something today so that tomorrow, looking back, you could be proud of yourself. Today you have a chance to make the life of “you of tomorrow” a little easier and more enjoyable. The less you think about tomorrow, the harder it will be for you to realize that the comet never arrived, and for the sake of a second pleasure you wasted time, money and effort.

Don't get me wrong, enjoying every day is great. And, of course, you cannot spend your whole life solely on preparing for the future. But there is only one category of people who have every right to live today - these are children. And for this reason, someone should take care of them.published

Always say what you feel and do what you think forgive me and thank you

If for one moment God forgot that I was just a rag puppet and gave me a piece of life, then I would probably not say everything I think, but I would definitely think what I say.
I would appreciate things, not for how much they cost, but for how much they mean. I would sleep less, dream more, realizing that every minute we close our eyes, we lose sixty seconds of light. I would walk while everyone else is standing, stay awake while others sleep. I would listen when others talk and how I would enjoy the wonderful taste of chocolate ice cream...
If God gave me one more moment of life, I would dress more modestly, lie in the sun, exposing not only my body, but also my soul to the warm rays. Lord, if I had a heart, I would write all my hate on ice and wait for the sun to come out. I would pour tears on roses to feel the pain of their thorns and the scarlet kiss of their petals...
Lord, if I had a piece of life left, I WOULD NOT SPEND A DAY WITHOUT TELLING THE PEOPLE I LOVE THAT I LOVE THEM.
I would convince every person dear to me of my love and live in love with love. I would explain to those who are mistaken, believing that they stop falling in love when they grow old, not realizing that they grow old when they stop falling in love!
I would give a child wings, but let him learn to fly on his own. I would convince the old people that death does not come with old age, but with oblivion. I learned so much from you people, I realized that everyone wants to live on the top of the mountain, not realizing that true happiness awaits him when he climbs the mountain.
I realized that from the moment when for the first time a newborn baby squeezes his father's finger in his little fist, he will never let him go again.
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I realized that one person has the right to LOOK AT ANOTHER FROM HIGHER only when he HELPING HIM Rise.
There are so many things that I could still learn from you people, but, in fact, they are unlikely to be useful, because by the time they put me in this suitcase, I, unfortunately, will already be dead. I have learned so much from you, but to tell you the truth, it is not of much use, because after stuffing my chest with it, I am dying.
Always say what you feel and do what you think. If I knew that today is the last time I see you sleeping, I would hug you tightly and pray to God that he would make me your guardian angel.
If I knew that today is the last time I see you walking out the door, I would hug you, kiss you and call you again to give you more. If I knew that I would hear your voice for the last time, I would record everything you say on tape so that I can listen to it again and again ... endlessly. If I knew that these are the last moments when I see you, I would say: "I love you", and I would not assume, fool, that you already know this.
There is always tomorrow and life gives us another opportunity to make things right, but if I am wrong and today is all we have left, I would like to tell you how much I love you and that I will never forget you.
Neither a young man nor an old man can be sure that tomorrow will come for him. Today may be the last time you see the ones you love. So don't wait for something, do it today, because if tomorrow never comes, you will regret the day when you didn't have time for one smile, one hug, one kiss, and when you were too busy to fulfill the last wish. Support people close to you, whisper in their ear how much you need them, love them and treat them carefully, take the time to say: “I'm sorry”, “forgive me”, “please” and “thank you” and that's all those words of love that you know.
NO ONE WILL REMEMBER YOU FOR YOUR THOUGHTS.

The situation when children, having quarreled, begin to play silent, is familiar to almost everyone. Adults call it childish. However, how to call the situation when two adults in a similar situation behave in the same way? Don't you know those spouses who, having quarreled, walk around and are silent? And not an hour or two, for several days and even weeks.

Or another example, when people who have visited the gallery tirelessly admire a painting called "Black Square", although they themselves do not understand anything about it. But how can they say otherwise, when it is known all over the world that the painting by Kazimir Malevich is one of the masterpieces of avant-garde art?

There are many examples when people do not know how to express their natural feelings, emotions, sensations, as well as the reasons for this. But the most dangerous thing about this is that just hiding one's feelings, emotions and sensations can lead to distorted values, dependent behavior, during the development of which people very often not only succumb to manipulation, social pressure, but become slaves. public opinion and destroy their own lives.

Why is it important to be able to say what you feel, and not be silent?

  1. We have all come across sayings like: “have time to say what you feel, otherwise it may be too late.” Indeed, many people do not know how to talk about feelings. They do not know how to say important words to each other, characterizing the feelings that they actually experience, which becomes the cause of divorces, separations, and subsequently, bitter regrets.
  2. To not be silent for a long time. In order for a misunderstanding not to turn into a quarrel, and then into a game called "silence", you need to learn to express your feelings verbally, whatever they may be. After all, even the same phrase, uttered with different accents, can carry its own, unlike the other, semantic load. And then what can we say about people who, due to a lack of explanations or complete silence in general, can perceive the situation/information distortedly.
  3. To rid yourself of inner discomfort. Sometimes there are situations when it is simply necessary to put an end to i.
  4. For your own freedom. “Speak out and you will feel better” - how often have you heard a similar phrase? Yes, yes, it is in it that the key to spiritual freedom is laid. A person cannot feel good if in his soul, in its different corners, feelings and emotions that have not managed to break free cannot be hidden. No one has ever said that I love you. Someone did not ask for forgiveness, etc. etc.
  5. To spare others the opportunity to manipulate you. People who, for various reasons (self-doubt, fear…) do not know how to verbally express their feelings, emotions, sensations, are very easy to manipulate. It is very easy for insecure people to impose someone else's opinion, to put social pressure on them.

In a word, the inability to talk about feelings, emotions and sensations is not freedom.

But there is another question: how independent are people in their judgments - do they really say what they feel? And what impact can other people have on this very judgment? We invite you to find out the answers to these questions from the film "I and Others", based on the experiments of Valeria Sergeevna Mukhina.

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